She sent the black tree frog to sit in front of me. Like a miniature black hole, he absorbed anything negative that the light expelled. At the height of the storm, he glowed the deep electric purple of a blacklight. I could feel him eating all my fear. Then he hopped away.
It took a variety of personal tools for me to survive the idea of cancer. A cancer diagnosis is difficult to live with because it holds the possibility of your own death up to your face every day, without fail. After the initial shock and the sheer force of emotional will required to process it, you are faced with the slow torture of doubt, fear, and the relentless shadow of recurrence, even if you are currently cancer-free. But there is hope!